Gai goes to the Beach
by greenlicious
Summary: REMASTERED- It was hot. It was very hot. Obviously this heat was affecting his pupils' performance. With thumb in air, Gai gleefully exclaimed, "Team! We are going to the beach!"


Gai goes to the Beach- REMASTERED! Written two years ago by a curious college student interested in fan fiction, Gai goes to the Beach delves in to the slightly ridiculous and very comedic lives of Team Gai. Greenlicious has combined her wild imagination and love of all things funny to give the reader an amusing view of what it might look like if Gai, Lee, Tenten, and Neji where to visit the beach. Enjoy.

* * *

><p>It was hot. It was very hot. It was so hot, that Gai was contemplating taking off his highly fashionable green spandex jumpsuit.<p>

With sweat dripping off his brow Gai looked across the training ground at his devoted protégé Lee, who even in the heat was in the middle of his 2,000 rounds of squats. "1,295… 1,296… 1,297… 1,298…" he heard Lee grunt haltingly as the usual kelly green of his spandex suit rapidly turned into more of a jade green with the buckets of sweat pouring off his laboring body.

With blazing flames of pride flickering in his eyes, Gai marveled at his favorite student's determination and perseverance. Pride grew to concern however when he observed that Lee's usually steel-like thighs began to tremble far too early in the workout.

Gai's focus then shifted towards the trees. In the shade sat Neji who recognized the futility of training in this heat and was quietly meditating. Nearby was Tenten, face red and dripping attempting to throw kunai at various targets and mostly missing.

Obviously this heat was affecting his pupils' performance. It was 8:00 in the morning (only two hours into their training) and Gai seriously doubted (something only those that lacked youth would do) whether they could complete their usual six-hour training block with this heat wave drowning Konoha.

Despite the high temperatures that made his body sluggish, Gai's mind was as sharp as ever. Upon careful examination Gai deduced several highly tactical ninja-worthy procedures that would eliminate the threat of contracting dehydration and/or heat exhaustion. These deductions ultimately pointed to one possible outcome. With a gleaming smile, Gai pranced over to his heavily perspiring teammates and assumed his nice-guy pose. With thumb in air, Gai gleefully exclaimed, "Team! We are going to the beach!"

-_An hour later_-

With every stride accentuated by the slapping of sandals against the bottoms of his feet, Gai plodded through hot gritty sand toward his destination. Clad only in a form-fitting green Speedo, matching flip-flops and sunglasses that resembled the eyes of one of Shino's bugs, Gai chose a small patch of empty sand smack-dab in the middle of the most crowded part of the beach.

Whistling the Fire Country's national anthem, Gai energetically opened his rainbow colored beach umbrella -in the process blocking many tanning civilians precious sunlight- and unrolled his kunai printed beach towel -flinging sand in several beach-goers eyes.

Ignoring all the stares/glares (he knows they're just jealous), Gai searched the crowded beach for his supremely talented students. Catching sight of Lee gesturing enthusiastically to Neji and Tenten, Gai began to crazily wave his arms in the air to gain his beloved pupils' attention.

Dodging running children carrying rapidly melting ice cream, Lee bounded toward his teacher round eyes wide with excitement. At more of a respectable pace, Tenten and a reluctant Neji (fate must be against him this day if he managed to get convinced to attend this living nightmare) followed their rambunctious teammate toward their destination.

Neji, annoyed at having to evade swarms of adolescent civilians attempting to impress the opposite sex with their awesomely tanned and sexy beach bodies, glared at anyone that dared to glance in his direction. Tenten on the other hand, was happy to be doing something other than training in this unbearable heat. It also helped that there were many muscled men to ogle (if only Neji would take off his shirt!)

Whipping out his notebook and pencil, Lee approached his teacher with manly tears streaming down his cheeks and declared "Gai-sensei! You are the coolest and most handsome man on the beach! Every eye is upon you sensei! No wonder you are called the Beautiful Green Beast of Konoha! Please teach me how to achieve your greatness!"

Gai equally as tearful, gave Lee a hug, exclaiming "Oh Lee!"

Embarrassed once again by her teammates' public display of affection, Tenten covered her face with her hands desperately trying to block the curious stares thrown in their group's direction. With the parting of the awkward embrace, Gai flashed a gleaming smile blinding everyone within a five-foot radius and said "Welcome to the beach my young and hip students!"

Lounging in the shade of his multi-colored beach umbrella, Gai once again congratulated himself on the quick thinking and strategic planning that resulted in a successful trip to one of Konoha's most popular beaches. Sipping ice-cold lemonade from a red and white striped straw, Gai observed his relaxing teammates.

Tenten had somehow gotten Neji to take off his shirt and join her in the refreshing waters of Leaf Lake. Neji refused to get his hair wet however, earning several teasing remarks from Tenten and an occasional daring splash.

Lee was more ambitious, enthusiastically declaring his usual self-imposed ultimatums. "Gai-sensei, if I cannot build 10 sand castles without them crumbling, then I will find 100 unbroken seashells!" With a dazzling smile, Gai gave an approving thumbs-up.

As the afternoon drifted by, Gai noticed the multitudes of beach bums engaging in various beach-like activities and decided that in order to maintain his youthful reputation he must participate in the physical sporting events taking place. Rummaging through his beach bag, Gai whipped out his SPF 30 and began applying it vigorously over his muscled body (if only he could reach his back…).

After being splashed one too many times, Neji grumpily approached the blanket and began wringing out his damp hair. Turning toward the genius, Gai thrust the bottle of sunscreen into Neji's hands, a grin of epic proportions stretching his face. Looking over his shoulder and winking, Gai asked "Neji my supremely skilled student! Will you do the honors?"

Neji had known Maito Gai for nearly six years. Countless times during those six years he considered himself ill fated for having been placed on Team Gai. With the man's questionable fashion sense and his obsession with all things youthful, Neji often wondered if his sensei had taken one too many blows to the head. But for all Gai's eccentricities, Neji grudgingly acknowledged the man's talent as an exceptional shinobi and secretly admired his ability to break through the bonds of social conformity. More often than not, Neji considered himself blessed to part of Gai's team.

Today however, was not one of those days.

Staring aghast at Gai's bare (and slightly hairy) back, down to the greasy bottle of sunscreen in his hands Neji truly believed that fate was set against him. Looking around, Neji saw that Tenten was still in the water flirting with heavily tanned and muscled boys trying to impress her with their macho swimming skills. No help there. Meanwhile Lee was furiously scooping sand in a red bucket, attempting to complete his first sand castle before the children playing nearby could ruin it yet again. No help there either.

Neji realized that none of his teammates were around to bail him out of this (literally) hairy situation. With sweat trickling down his pale brow (or was that water from the lake?), Neji quickly analyzed his options. He concluded that the best way to escape this frightening task would be to talk his way out.

Inner Gai was laughing maniacally (his deviousness is a little known fact) at Neji's tortured expression. Using his exuberance and youthful spirit as a disguise for his true intent, Gai made sure to utilize every opportunity available to ruffle the stoic boy's feathers. Someone in the prime of their youth should not have to suffer the effects of old age so early in life.

The smile never having left his face, Gai grabbed the bottle of sunscreen from Neji's hands and globbed half the contents in Neji's palms before he could open his mouth to refuse. Glaring at his hands as if it were their fault that he was in this position, Neji concluded that fate officially hated him. Then as if by a miracle, Lee and Tenten returned to Gai's beach blanket seeking refreshments and shelter from the late afternoon sun.

Neji was certain Lee would be more than happy to take over the job of rubbing sun tan lotion on his beloved sensei. However before Neji could make his suggestion Gai blurted out, "Welcome back my esteemed students! I see you have enjoyed our youthful beach outing! As you can see here, Neji has volunteered to apply sunscreen on…" "TENTEN!" Neji nearly shouted, saying the first thing that popped into his head.

Blushing slightly at the implication his words had, Neji glanced at Tenten's shocked but smiling face (what is this fluttery feeling in his stomach?). Relieved that she hadn't pounded him into next week and embarrassed at what he now had to do, Neji tried to will his mouth into a smile. Crisis averted.

As Neji carefully applied sunscreen to his female teammate's (significantly less hairy) back, Gai slung his arm around Lee and turned to face the sun setting over Leaf Lake. With rivers of tears falling from each eye, Gai once again congratulated himself on the quick thinking and strategic planning that resulted in a successful attempt at loosening his uptight pupil.

Satisfied with the day's achievements but aware that he never accomplished his goal of participating in the youthful beach games the civilians were playing, Gai wiped the tears from his face and called over his shoulder. "Neji? When you are done messaging Tenten, would you apply sunscreen to my back?"

If Lee had been looking at Gai, he would have questioned the unfamiliar mischievous glint in his beloved sensei's eye.


End file.
